This is a true story. I did not write it. The names have been eliminated to protect the stupid.
On our way back from dropping [names] off at the airport, we stopped for lunch at Marie Callender's. We both ate a wonderful chicken salad with pecans, oranges, and gorgonzola cheese. Since they were running a 99 cent pie special, of course we were forced to have pie for dessert. [Name] ordered lemon meringue, and I ordered blueberry with cream.As we were walking to the car, [name] glanced down and noticed a large glop on the front of his shirt. He complained about how he can't seem to eat anything without dropping some on himself. Then, he reached down and scooped the glop off of his shirt and popped it into his mouth, while I watched in amazement.His eyes began to bug out immediately, and he gagged and coughed. When I asked him what was wrong, all he could manage was a strangled, "Bird poop!"After a few minutes of hysterical laughing, I asked him why he would scoop ANYTHING off of his shirt and put it into his mouth - no less an anonymous goopy stain.His reply was, "Well, I wanted to find out if it was blueberry or lemon."I think that we need to watch him more closely in the future.